'Resolving Christian Disputes: A Guide to Unity and Healing'

Christian Disputes

In the Bible, Christians are given guidance on how to handle disputes within the community. Matthew 18 provides principles that can be applied when conflicts arise. Jesus says, “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector” (verses 15–17).

Addressing Conflict Personally

The first step in resolving disputes is for Christians to address the matter directly with the person involved. By approaching the individual privately, there is an opportunity to clarify misunderstandings and increase the likelihood of a positive response. Handling matters privately also helps to prevent gossip, as taking a dispute to others instead of addressing it directly with the person involved can lead to further misunderstanding and escalation.

Involving Additional Witnesses

If a private discussion does not lead to resolution, Christians are advised to seek the help of one or two other believers. This step aligns with the Old Testament principle that required two or more witnesses for a charge to be considered valid. By involving additional witnesses, there is an objective perspective brought into the situation, which can aid in determining the appropriate course of action.

Taking Disputes Before the Church

Should steps one and two fail to resolve the conflict, Christians are then instructed to bring the matter before the local church. In most cases, when confronted with the involvement of the entire congregation, a Christian seeking to follow the Lord will not persist in refusing to address the conflict. This step emphasizes the importance of community and accountability within the church.

Excommunication as a Last Resort

When a person at the center of the conflict refuses to respond positively even when the entire congregation is involved, the final step is to treat that person as “a pagan or a tax collector.” This means excommunicating the individual, effectively removing their negative influence from the congregation. It is important to note that this step should be taken only in rare cases and is aimed at preserving the holiness and well-being of the church community.

Biblical Examples of Discipline

The apostle Paul provides an example of discipline in 1 Corinthians 5. In this letter, Paul addresses a situation where a believer had engaged in sexual immorality, specifically with his stepmother. Instead of condemning the act, the Corinthian Christians had tolerated the behavior. Paul instructs them to remove this person from their church family (1 Corinthians 5:3). However, in 2 Corinthians, Paul writes that this same individual had turned away from their sinful lifestyle. Paul advises the Corinthians to accept him back into their community and reaffirm their love for him (2 Corinthians 2:8). This example highlights the ultimate goal of discipline, which is not to be harsh or unloving but to condemn sinful behavior and call for repentance and restoration.

Handling Disputes in Love

Throughout the process of resolving disputes, Christians are called to demonstrate love and seek restoration. The steps outlined in Matthew 18 provide a framework for conflict resolution based on a desire for holy living and genuine care for the person involved. By addressing conflicts personally, involving additional witnesses, and seeking resolution within the church community, Christians aim to restore relationships and promote unity.

Why This Matters

Disputes and conflicts are inevitable within any community, including Christian communities. How these conflicts are handled can significantly impact the health of relationships and the overall witness of Christianity. Following biblical principles for conflict resolution helps maintain peace, fosters forgiveness, and promotes reconciliation.

Think About It

1. Have you ever witnessed a dispute within a Christian community? How was it resolved? Did it align with the principles outlined in Matthew 18?
2. How can the process of addressing conflicts directly and privately help prevent misunderstandings and promote reconciliation?
3. What does it mean to handle disputes in love? How does this approach differ from simply seeking to prove oneself right or win an argument?